https://adaa.org

ADAA Videos:

Managing the Roller Coaster of Emotions During COVID-19, ADAA Video – ADAA member Bethany Teachman, PhD
https://adaa.org/webinar/consumer/managing-roller-coaster-emotions-during-covid-19

Putting on the Oxygen Mask – How to Take Care of Yourself so You Can Take Care of Your Child, ADAA Video – ADAA member Rachel Busman, PsyD
https://adaa.org/webinar/consumer/putting-oxygen-mask-how-take-care-yourself-so-you-can-take-care-your-child

Experiencing Financial Stress Due to COVID-19? Learn Stress-Relieving Tips from Anxiety and Financial Experts, ADAA Video – ADAA member Debra Kissen, PhD and Financial planners Kristina Caragiulo and Nick Cosky from BDF LLC in Chicago
https://adaa.org/webinar/consumer/experiencing-financial-stress-due-covid-19-learn-stress-relieving-tips-anxiety-and

Managing Coronavirus Anxiety: Tips and Strategies for Families – ADAA Video – ADAA members Ken Goodman, LCSW, Debra Kissen, PhD and David H. Rosmarin, PhD, ABPP
https://adaa.org/webinar/consumer/managing-coronavirus-anxiety-tips-and-strategies-families

Quick Expert Tips and Strategies to Manage Coronavirus Anxiety – ADAA 5 minute Video – ADAA member Dr. Debra Kissen
https://youtu.be/xP14-Pc56xU. ADAA also has free peer-to-peer support groups. 

And last, but not least, here’s a great article from “Best Sleep Health”

How to sleep better if you have coronavirus-related anxiety or sleep disturbances.

More Resources You May Like:

I AM: A Guided Journey to Your Authentic Self

A Workbook and Journal

How to write the highest vibrating, most powerful affirmations to manifest love, positivity, peace, self-confidence, motivation, success, and other wonderful things

Sold worldwide in any bookstore.

Quick links:

Barnes and Noble

Amazon

Walmart

Author Site

Join the Free Email Survival Course:

Weekly lessons, strategies, and homework to start you moving forward

from the effects of hurtful or toxic relationships, dysfunctional thinkers, and Lemon Moms.

Private Facebook group included for members only.

There’s an app for that!

Get THE TOOLBOX APP

for instant information, support, and validation!

The Lemon Moms Series:

B&N

Kindle

Audible

Amazon

Nook

Google

Apple

Available formats: eBook, audiobook, hardcover, paperback, and large print too!

Get the TOOLBOX articles twice monthly to your inbox!

About the Author

As a result of growing up in a dysfunctional home, and with the help of professional therapists and continued personal growth, Diane Metcalf developed strong coping skills and healing strategies for herself. She happily shares those with others who want to learn and grow. 

Her Lemon Moms series and other books and articles are a combination of her education, knowledge, personal growth, and insight from her childhood experiences and subsequent recovery work.

Diane holds a Master of Science degree in Information Technology and a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology. She’s worked in numerous fields, including domestic violence and abuse, and is an experienced advocate, speaker, and writer about family dysfunction. On The Toolbox, she writes about recovery strategies from hurtful people and painful, dysfunctional, or toxic relationships. She has authored four transformational books about healing and moving forward from narcissistic Victim Syndrome.

Visit her author’s site here: DianeMetcalf.com

Learn about the Lemon Moms series here: Lemon Moms

This website is intended for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy.

The issue

I like data. Databases, writing queries to collect data, and informational reporting are fascinating activities for me. I have a degree in Information Management and I like information in all forms; information is my jam. So during this time of self-quarantine, to feel safe, it’s essential that I have access to accurate, credible, trustworthy information and reports that help keep my family and me safe and healthy.

On news shows and social media platforms, many times, “information“ is really an individual’s perspective or opinion. And when others don’t share that point of view, nasty disagreements can ensue.

I’m all for having disagreements. There’s nothing inherently wrong with disagreeing with someone. I think sharing and discussing differing viewpoints is healthy and necessary to learn and grow. Differences in opinion and perspective can be voiced in a healthy, respectful, and productive way. My husband and I have differences in opinion, and when that happens, we usually speak calmly, in a respectful tone and demeanor. Often we end up agreeing to disagree. We don’t hurt each other simply because we have differing viewpoints. He’s entitled to his, and I’m entitled to mine. We don’t have to agree on everything. We are individuals.

Differences in points of view can inspire us to question, listen, and learn something new.

What’s not healthy, when disagreeing, is showing blatant disrespect, refusing to listen, judging, offering non-constructive criticism and unsolicited advice, close-mindedness, shouting, and name-calling. When those things begin happening on news programs or social media, whether spoken or written, bye-bye, I’m outa there. I don’t feel a need to be part of that chaos.

You can see how that wouldn’t benefit me in a time of needing and wanting information. I didn’t want only information that aligned with what I already knew or believed; I wanted everything. I wanted to be able to consider other viewpoints and opinions and decide for myself which of them are the most credible or applicable to me. That means that I had to develop the intestinal fortitude to sit through some of those challenges and emotional triggers mentioned above.

Practice makes perfect

Now I’m not going to sit here and tell you that suddenly I’m extremely comfortable witnessing situations that still feel threatening. No, not at all.

What’s changed is my willingness to go out of my comfort zone and stay.

News programs and social media can absolutely instill fear in some more than others. If you’ve grown up in a scary, threatening, or traumatic home environment, you know what I’m talking about. I’d started purposefully seeking out and identifying my triggers a while ago, and intentionally working to alleviate them. I recognized this as another opportunity.

Differences in points of view can inspire us to question, listen, and learn something new.

Having the opportunity to see issues from another’s point of view, and to learn something new, became more important to me than staying in my comfort zone.​ So I began sitting through the chaos and the triggers, forcing myself to remember that I’m in my own home, that I’m an adult, that I’m safe. Little by little, I began to hear and learn things that I wouldn’t have otherwise. My tolerance for witnessing heated differences of opinion eventually increased. Angry arguments between others began to feel less threatening. That, in itself, broadened my perspective. I found myself more willing to sit through what used to feel intimidating or scary. 

Real life doesn’t happen n a bubble. I think sitting through uncomfortable moments has helped me to understand that I’m stronger and more resilient than I thought. I feel emotionally stronger in doing this exercise. I’m going to continue.

What about you?

What have the pandemic and self quarantining taught you about yourself? What have you learned? To share your experience with my readers, go to DianeMetcalf.com/story and send me your story!

Tools:

Self-care: We can only choose to focus on and be responsible for ourselves, our own thoughts, actions, and behavior. The good news is that we can change ourselves with patience, persistence, and practice. We can take responsibility for getting our needs met instead of waiting for someone to change or meet our needs for us. We are in control of ourselves, and no one is responsible for us but us.

Practice mindfulness

Learn about setting boundaries.

Learn about codependency and maladaptive coping skills

Take the Adverse Childhood Experiences quiz

Learn about C-PTSD

More Resources You May Like:

I AM: A Guided Journey to Your Authentic Self

A Workbook and Journal

How to write the highest vibrating, most powerful affirmations to manifest love, positivity, peace, self-confidence, motivation, success, and other wonderful things

Sold worldwide in any bookstore.

Quick links:

Barnes and Noble

Amazon

Walmart

Author Site

Join the Free Email Survival Course:

Weekly lessons, strategies, and homework to start you moving forward

from the effects of hurtful or toxic relationships, dysfunctional thinkers, and Lemon Moms.

Private Facebook group included for members only.

There’s an app for that!

Get THE TOOLBOX APP

for instant information, support, and validation!

The Lemon Moms Series:

B&N

Kindle

Audible

Amazon

Nook

Google

Apple

Available formats: eBook, audiobook, hardcover, paperback, and large print too!

Get the TOOLBOX articles twice monthly to your inbox!

About the Author

As a result of growing up in a dysfunctional home, and with the help of professional therapists and continued personal growth, Diane Metcalf developed strong coping skills and healing strategies for herself. She happily shares those with others who want to learn and grow. 

Her Lemon Moms series and other books and articles are a combination of her education, knowledge, personal growth, and insight from her childhood experiences and subsequent recovery work.

Diane holds a Master of Science degree in Information Technology and a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology. She’s worked in numerous fields, including domestic violence and abuse, and is an experienced advocate, speaker, and writer about family dysfunction. On The Toolbox, she writes about recovery strategies from hurtful people and painful, dysfunctional, or toxic relationships. She has authored four transformational books about healing and moving forward from narcissistic Victim Syndrome.

Visit her author’s site here: DianeMetcalf.com

Learn about the Lemon Moms series here: Lemon Moms

This website is intended for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy.